Since I'm Bored...

In all rights, I shouldn't be bored. I have plenty to do. Unfortunately all of that which I have to do is boring. Therefore, I'm wasting time and stealing this from TaLaisa's blog:

A List of Eights

8 TV Shows I Love to Watch
1. The L Word
2. Dexter
3. House
4. Gossip Girl {shuddup}
5. Pushing Daisies
6. The Food Network {all}
7. The Discovery Channel {almost all}
8. The Simpsons

8 Things that Happened Yesterday
1. I skipped church because all three of us were sick.
2. I finished the cycle 15 billing for work.
3. I ate an apple with peanut butter, as well as some Triscuits with homemade olive tapanade.
4. I watched 2 episodes of House while I finished knitting a washcloth for a friend.
5. I only wore pajamas.
6. I talked to my hubby for hours in bed when we were supposed to be sleeping.
7. I text messaged with my friend Nikki about 8 trillion times.
8. I taught Oliver where his knee was, and to say the world "girl".

8 Favorite Places to Eat
1. Home.
2. Trio Cafe. {American food, trendy, downtown.}
3. Cafe Trang. {Vietnamese, Draper}
4. A Taste of Punjab {Indian, Sandy}
5. Noodles and Co {fast noodley dishes, Sandy}
6. Johnny Carino's {Italian, Sandy}
7. Sage's Cafe {vegan, organic, downtown}
8. The last one is a toss-up between Chipotle {fresh mex, Sandy} and Subway {something about it is just so great...lol}

8 Things I Am Looking Forward To
1. Oliver being older and more reasonable.
2. Not being fat anymore.
3. My cookbook being published.
4. Group this week.
5. Dressing Oliver up in his lion costume for Halloween.
6. Guacamole tonight.
7. Vegan Freaks meetup.
8. The election being over so everyone quits sending me idiotic forwarded messengers about the fate of the nation.

8 Things on My Wish List
1. A really nice blender.
2. To visit Iceland.
3. To go back to Boston and see Nikki again.
4. That my cookbook gets picked up by a big publisher. This little publisher stuff is for the birds.
5. To lose 100 lbs immediately if not sooner.
6. A finished house that is not under constant construction.
7. To learn how to say no.
8. To be good and talented at something, rather than just "decent" at a lot of things.

8 People I Tag
No one, but if you do this on your blog, let me know in the comments and I'll go read it. :)

New Banner, w00t!

My talented friend Kelly made me this kickin' new banner, so I thought...what better time to start posting again on my blog.

Now I have to think of something to post...

Be back later with interesting tidbits. I promise!

Once Upon a Time...

I just found these old relics when I was cleaning out computer files. They are from 2001, when Rian and I just started dating! Too funny! [And my gosh, these pics make me want to lose about 90 lbs immediately if not sooner, yeesh.]

Tagged! Exciting Info About Me.

So...I used to post in this blog about a year ago, but then it slowly fell by the wayside. But, as my friend Di has tagged me to answer a survey, I thought I might as well reactivate this and attach it to my profile. After all, if Oliver gets a blog, mommy can have one too!

Okay, now onto the "exciting info" [snort]:

1. What were you doing 10 years ago?
I was about a month into my sophmore year at high school. I was in Social Studies class with Mr. Lemeiux. I was probably hoping that the cute boy sitting a few seats behind me would notice me someday. (He never did.)

2. 5 years ago?
I was in Latin class at BYU. I had just gotten married about 5 months prior. I was probably doodling in my notebook, rather than paying attention.

3. 1 year ago?
I was getting excited for my prenatal doctor's appointment the next day. I was hoping that they would do an ultrasound so that I could see my baby. I had no idea what parenthood meant, or how much it would change my life.

4. Yesterday?
Yesterday at this time I was trying to get some work done while simultaneously holding Oliver (who every-so-helpfully was pushing the keys on the keyboard and looking up at me grinning, so proud of himself that he could erase an entire spreadsheet with one stroke).

5. 5 favorite snacks?
This is a tough one...cold cereal, Diet Cherry Coke, frozen GoGurt, popcorn, and sour gummy worms.

6. If I had one million dollars what would I do with it?
In order of importance: pay off the house, put money in 3 separate high-yield index fund accounts for our 3 planned children, put money into another high-yield index fund for retirement, buy a second car, finish remodeling the house, pay off Rian's mom's house, pay for my little sisters to finish college without having to work, pay for Rian to go to medical school if he wanted to go...maybe go on a vacation. How boring am I? lol

7. 5 places I would run away to?
I always have fantasies of taking Rian and Oliver and just running off to someplace where no one knows us and we don't have to work and we can just hang out. Las Vegas, Waterton National Park, Oregon coast, Boston (Province Town), my bedroom...

8. 5 favorite TV shows?
Clean House, America's Next Top Model, anything on The Food Network, Scrubs, The L Word

9. 5 things I hate?
Poor grammar/spelling, closed-minded people, people who don't just freaking THINK, moms that don't appreciate being stay-at-home-moms, onions.

10. 5 people I tag?
I don't have anyone to tag. BOO HOO!

White & Nerdy

'Nough said, yo!

(Sorry, nothing to say lately. Update soon.)

A Dissertation on Rap Music

My excuse is that I'm a percussionist. I've been beating out rhythms on any available surface since I was old enough to coordinate my hand movements. It's in my blood, and therefore not my fault AT ALL that I occasionally indulge in some rap music. There is something about the beats and rhythms in a rap song that any percussionist and/or math freak can't help but crave.

So it's not my fault at all, you see, that I just happened to be listening to some soulful tunes on my way to work this morning.

Unfortunately, I'm in an analytical mood today, and the thing about rap music is this: the lyrics are ridiculous. All of them. I don't think I've ever heard a rap song that didn't contain some form of nonsensicality (yes I did just make up that word). As I listened to Nelly sing about the pair of shoes he just bought, and then about his "grill" (which my husband had to explain to me was some type of dental appliance and not something you char burgers on), I realized that rap songs seem to be comprised of the following components:

1. I have some hos
2. My clothes/shoes/dental appliances are great (and expensive)
3. I make more money than you
4. I like my car
5. My penis is 10 inches long
6. I am better than you
7. I am a gansta and could therefore kill you

This put visions in my head of a great financial endeavor I shall now undertake -- building a rap song generator! Before you laugh, hear me out. Have you ever seen those recipe sites where you select an ingredient from each of the categories, and then it combines it all and gives you a casserole recipe? I'm going to make the same type of thing for rap songs, and sell it to rap artists who are a little down on their luck and need to put out a quick album.

For example, one could choose "I go thumpin' with my bling bling on" from the Rap About My Clothing category, and there they've got a line that they can use and repeat throughout their upcoming greatest hit. Combine that with a "rollin' on my 20's" from the Rap About My Car category, and soon every little thug will be "rollin'" with the song on full blast.

In all seriousness, it was somewhat disappointing to me to realize how assinine the lyrics in nearly all of the rap songs I listen to are. I'm afraid my literary nerd voice will now have to battle it out with the little gansta in me every time I think about belting out "Give me two perrr! I want two perrr! So I can get to stompin' in my Errrrr Force Ones!"

I'm out.

Old People

Now don't get me wrong, I respect age and wisdom as much as the next person. Some of the most interesting people that I know are old. All of you old people who have figured out how to turn on your computers (congrats on that, by the way) and happen to be reading this, this is likely not a flame on you, so think before leaving me a nasty defensive comment.

But seriously. Old people.

What is it about growing old that makes you feel:

a) entitled
b) wronged
c) justified in overriding whether the light is on or off at work at 6-bloody-45 in the morning, regardless of the fact that the 20+ other of us want it OFF vs. your solitary vote for it being on

Can you already predict my rant for the day?

Coming to work before the sun even has to get up is bad enough, but knowing that just a few minutes into the day you're going to be blinded by putrid fluorescent lighting makes it just that much worse. Me and the other troglodytes prefer to leave the lights off and let our eye adjust as the sun starts to come up and through the massive windows that line our walls.

But she. She has to hobble in and flip the glaring switch the second she's here, regardless of the chorus of protests: hey, turn it off! Between you and I, I think she may be too senile to realize that our protests are directed at the fact that she just turned on the light. Perhaps she fantasizes that her turning on the light directly correlates to us all telling ourselves, out loud, to turn off our bad attitudes because the sunshine has been let into our lives. This is one of the greatest mysteries.

What is that you say? Go turn the light back off? Oh, but why would I do that when I could write a scathing blog entry about it instead!

Honestly. Old people.